Maybe not so Quick

Metropolitan Police Assistant Commissioner Bob Quick is in trouble again. The last time the top cop hit the news was after he ordered the arrest of senior Tory MP Damian Green over alleged security leaks last year and in December, he apologised after accusing the Conservatives of involvement in newspaper stories about his wife's hire car business.

So what has the clown done now? Well one of his roles is as lead for counter-terrorism and for the Association of Chief Police Officers (ACPO). Obviously he gets to see lots of juicy intelligence about what terrorists are doing in our country. Well yesterday he stupidly got himself photographed by journos walking into Downing Street with a bunch of papers clearly marked 'Secret' and apprently containing details of an operation against Al Quaeda suspects. Because of his idiocity, several operations against suspected terrorists had to be immediately brought forward and executed.

All is well though, as he is sorry for being a dork, a Scotland Yard spokesman said: "Assistant Commissioner Quick accepts he made a mistake on leaving a sensitive document on open view and deeply regrets it."

Roman Catholic Church employs lap dancers to boost congregations

38 year old Italian nun Anna Nobili is no ordinary nun, before donning the drab outfit of nunnery and promising God she would never have sex again she was a normal woman. Much more than this she was a lap dancer displaying her wares to all and sundry in the hope that punters would shove money into her g-string.

Now she has seen God and recognised the evil of her ways, she promises that she will never again strip off in front of an audience but she refuses to stop dancing. She is now using her talents in a rather different way - for what she calls "The Holy Dance" in a performance on Tuesday evening at the Holy Cross in Jerusalem Basilica in Rome, in front of senior Catholic clerics including Archbishop Gianfranco Ravasi, head of the Vatican's Cultural Department.

When she turned her back on a life of sleeze, Sister Nobili joined the order of nuns called the Working Lady Nuns of Nazareth House, and it is through them that she tours prisons and hospitals performing her modern Christian dance. She says the Church is very open to what she does and the male prisoners appreciate her dancing. When asked what she wears, Sister Nobili giggles and says 'My cassock, but what I wear under it is a secret unless you put enough money in my pocket for a private dance'.

US Government to be sued for supporting Bin Laden and the IRA

In 1991, President De Clerk of South Africa ended his country's system of Apartheid whereby blacks were separated in society from whites with different laws, rights and privileges. For those of you who cannot remember, when SA had apartheid, there was a UN ruling that the rest of the world was not to deal with the African nation in an endeavour to force the country to scrap its unfair system.

The majority of the world did ignore SA and refused to deal with it either politically or economically, however, there was a lot of behind the screens deals going on and many countries did operate with SA. Why did they do this? Well it was not because they agreed with apartheid or that they were racists themselves, it was the little matter that SA had an adundance of diamonds and other natural resources.

So it all ended 18 years ago, people have got on with their lives for nearly 2 decades, even Nelson Mandela the African Nationalist Party terrorist was legitimised as a politician and made it to 'Prez'. So what happens 18 years later?

US District Judge Shira Scheindlin in New York has allowed court actions against: IBM, Daimler, Ford, General Motors and Rheinmetall Group, the Swiss parent of an armaments maker. Aparently this is because these companies dealt with the SA government thereby allowing apartheid to continue.

The best explanation from the cuckoo judge is when he explains why IBM are on the list. They supplied computers to the SA Civil Service, therefore they knew their products were being used to help strip black South Africans of their rights. The judge disagreed with IBM's argument that it was not the company's place to tell clients how to use its products.

If this is the case, when are the 1000s of victims of Osama Bin Laden around the world going to be allowed to sue the US Government for supplying him with both training and arms prior to 9/11 and the 1000s of victims of the IRA given similar rights to sue to US government for recognising the IRA and offering support and financial assistance in their insurgence against the UK government?

Selfish 'mother' left children home alone and flew to Spain on holiday - spared jail

A Welsh woman, who cannot be named for legal reasons flew off to Spain, leaving her two children aged 10 and 14 home alone for a week was convicted today of exposing the girls to unnecessary suffering or injury to health at Rhondda Magistrates' Court but the limp Judge did not send her to prison. Her well thought out defence was that the kids were always moaning and she wanted to teach them a lesson.

Crap defence or not it worked. Apparently, in Wales your children have to die before you are punished. I suppose though that it makes life easier for other parents who are planning summer holidays, at least now they can dump their kids at home and not worry about the expense of childminders.

Obese Harry Potter star running drug cartel in London

Obese child actor Jamie Waylett (19) who plays Vincent Crabbe in the children's Harry Potter film series has been caught red handed in London whilst driving his car with 8 bags of cannabis on him. When his home was later raided, police found 10 full cannabis plants, worth around £2000 growing there. He and a friend were charged with possession and production of a Class B Controlled Drug.

I do have to say that I always thought he was a secret cake and sweet eater (I mean being only 19, how did he get so fat in so few years). Now I know he is a secret cannabis grower I suppose he has gone up a little in my estimation, at least he must have some form of personality rather than the bland, teenager he normally comes across as.

Foreign Animal Rapes and Kills British Woman

A Slovakian man, Marek Harcar (33) has been convicted of robbing, raping then killing Britsh woman Moira Jones (40) in a Glasgow park during May last year. This was not some date rape here, this was an animal attacking a decent woman going about her own business.

Moira had parked her car next to Queen's Park and was walking home when Harcar grabbed her then dragged her into the park where he brutally beat and raped her in a holly bush before draging her further into the park and murdering her. She was found the next day by a park worker having sustained 65 injuries.

This is yet another case in a string of violent sex attacks on British women by immigrants. What makes this one worse though is the fact that the Slovikian already had 13 previous convictions, 4 of which were for violence related offences.

Why was this man allowed into the UK? Once he was in why was he allowed to stay when he was committing such offences? Why does the government not deport these people as soon as it is obvious they are not prepared to live by our laws?

The result? An horrific and needless death to a young British woman. A minimum of 25 years high security prison charges whilst the animal lives in a British prison care of the British tax payer.

The UK government needs to sit down and have a good long look at its immigration policies. More people die a year in the UK at the hands of these foreign animals than they do of any Taliban or other Islamic terrorists on our soil. Priorities? No, they have got them all wrong, it is far more important to keep other EU countries happy that we are welcoming the scum of Europe into our once peaceful land.

Hugh Jackman is a traitor to Australia!!

Actor Hugh Jackman, known as Wolverine to his friends has really dropped himself in it this time. We are talking career ending stuff here. The Ozzy star keeps a Twitter going to let his fans know what he is doing with his life. Not a bad idea and it is pretty good of Jackman to do so.  The problem is, the star put an entry on his Twitter saying, "Having lunch on the harbor across from the Opera Center. Loving life!"

Well, the PC police got him on that one, Jackman spelt 'Harbour' the American way and refered to the Sydney Opera House as 'the Opera Center'. Erm, so what?

1. What loser spends his/her day reading Jackman's twitter - sounds a bit like a stalker to me.

2. Who cares how he spells harbor - there you go I just spelt it wrong!!!
3.  The area around Sydney Opera House is referred to by locals as 'the Opera Centre'
4. With what is happening in the world, did this really need to be 'breaking headlines'?