BNP go religious on us!

It has long been recognised that the Christian faith of the population of the UK has been in steep decline and being a newly appointed Reverend myself, faith is obviously close to my heart (just next to my pack of cigarettes and cool beer to be precise).

This is due to a number of reasons, the most notable being the amount of non-christian immigrants and the boredom of the youth of today with everything God - I mean you cannot play your PS3 in church without getting told off and threatened with eternal damnation.

So who will be the saviour of the British Church? Well, believe it or not, the British Nationalist Party (BNP) has championed the church in its latest election campaign. As a party it is worried about the Islamification of Britain, pointing to other European countries such as the Netherlands and France, which they say are rapidly losing their Christian identity. This is a fair argument and, as other political parties are terrified to even mention the word 'God' for fear of offending non-Christians then someone has to.

Their new election posters include a line from the gospels:

"If they have persecuted me, they will also persecute you." Followed by the question: "What would Jesus do?" then the answer - "vote BNP".

As you may have guessed, the BNP is not very happy with the church at the moment as it (the church) recently banned any members from joining the BNP. The BNP's spokesman Simon Darby said: "It's something that the Church brought on themselves when they decided to interfere in the democratic process. If someone wants to take us on, they can expect the same in return."

You have to hand it to them, at least they have a sense of humour.